Thursday, February 1, 2018

Review: The Promise Between Us (by Barbara Claypole White)

My Rating: 4 stars

The Promise Between Us is the second book about mental illness that I've read so far this year and while I feel like this one didn't have the emotional depth that the book I read earlier (Mira T. Lee's Everything Here is Beautiful) did, it was still a worthwhile read, and one that I would definitely recommend.  One of the reasons why I love reading is because of the wonderful ability that books have to broaden my horizons and teach me things that I either did not know previously or I knew but perhaps had a limited, even flawed, understanding of.  This book in particular was an eye-opener for me in that, through the story of Katelyn (Katie) and her struggle with OCD (Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder) as well as how it impacted those close to her, I gained some much-needed insight that helped me correct some of the misconceptions I had about the illness.

I will admit that prior to reading this book, I was one of those people who thought that OCD was a minor disorder which involved being obsessed with cleanliness, order, and avoiding germs.  Like many others who may not have experience dealing with mental illness on a personal level, my perception of OCD was pretty much in line with the way the illness is typically portrayed in our society – namely that people with OCD wash their hands until they bleed, sterilize every utensil they use in restaurants, refuse to shake hands or be touched by anyone for fear of spreading germs.  Now I realize how flawed and misguided that perception was. I was floored to learn the true nature of this illness, its pervasiveness, and how it can manifest itself in so many different ways.  I appreciate the tremendous detail on OCD that the author Barbara Claypole White provided via her characters' experiences and relationships, in a way that made it easily accessible and understood for readers such as myself who, up to this point, had such a flawed understanding of this debilitating illness.  There is a particular scene in the book where Katie tries to explain her illness to her ex-husband Callum, tying it back to her past family history and the possibility that their 10-year-old daughter Maisie may be suffering from the same illness, to which Callum's initial response is reflective of the stereotypical view of OCD:  "…Maisie is a confident, happy child…she doesn't wash her hands until they bleed.  She's not a neat freak."  So many powerful scenes such as this one, where we are given insight into the various manifestations of OCD (i.e. postpartum OCD, harm OCD, etc.) as well as other forms of mental illness such as anxiety disorder, PTSD, depression, etc. – all heavy topics, yet dealt with in a way that didn't feel heavy-handed or preachy.  Reading the author's notes, her family's history with OCD, her real-life inspiration for the characters in the story, also helped to put things in perspective for me.  Of course, I will never understand mental illness the same way someone who suffers from it day in and day out does, but I appreciate the fact that books like this one help bring wider awareness to such important issues.

The story itself was well-written, the characters well-developed and flushed out.  I like that each chapter was told from the perspective of the various characters, though personally I feel that the story would have been more impactful if told in first person rather than third person.  Though I liked the characters for the most part and felt that they were realistically portrayed, I wasn't able to connect as much on an emotional level with them for some reason.  Perhaps it is because I read this book not long after reading another book about mental illness, Everything Here is Beautiful, which did such an amazing job in terms of putting us into the minds of the characters and made the experience overall so much more personal – that book set the bar quite high for me, a standard that will be hard to top.  Regardless though, The Promise Between Us was a great effort by the author to bring OCD and its impact to the forefront and I would definitely read more books by her! 

Received ARC from Lake Union Publishing via NetGalley

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